Boi Growing Up

..listening, watching, observing, learning, experiencing..

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Hey Its Me, Again

Posted by ckashaan on March 6, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. 2 Comments

Hey guys, its Anthony again, LOL. And i had an okay day so far. I mean i don’t know how else to put it really but i had two tests today though. It was for U.S History and Geometry. U.S was easy, but the geometry man why does it have to so complicated. Like seriously i wish they could make less complicated and a heck a lot easier. Don’t you guys think it would been a lot easier to understand the content instead of making things so complicated? Any who, so all day i was thinking about something….. I didn’t know what to write for today so yea. I was in Spanish  class and my teacher said to do the do now on page 96 right and i said “which one A2 or B1?” ” Do the whole page but do A2.” She got me so confused pissed and i asked again and she said the same thing so i said okay. So we were reading a story from a text book about some guy stole something from a museum. It was almost end of the period and i was listening to music because normally none of my teachers say anything with one headphone in my ear. And i was singing softly so no one could hear me and my teacher goes “wait….. who’s singing?” So i literally turned to the next page and my friend crystal sitting next to me was dieing. The whole class started to laugh and the funny part no one knew it was me singing. I was dieing LOL. But got away with it though and play it smooth, even though i have a terrible voice but play it smooth LOL. Any way, i enjoy talking to you guys about my day, i hope to you guys again about something or anything random. Have a great day even its cold outside, but have a great day LOL. Bye guys.

Hi I Am Anthony

Posted by ckashaan on February 27, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. 2 Comments

Hi my name is Anthony, Cory’s little brother. I want to talk a little about myself. I am 17 years old, a junior in high school trying to figure out what i want right now but as of right now computer visual designer. I am a cool guy as far as my brother put it when talked about his day, i heard. I am sweet, kind, at times a little emotional. I really hope that  you guys will get to know me more and of course you guy. Yes i am on my brother blog because i wanted to post something about day or week as of that manner. This day wasn’t pleasant as it thought it might be. Today, soon as i get into the school, my friends started telling me about some dress that i didn’t even know about. And i just have this tired look and i don’t know what are you talking about so get away from me look. All day i have been tired but until my speech class i started to wake up suddenly. I really don’t know why but yea. Probably my mind is excited for speech but why i would i be excited for speech when i could be just excited to sleep. A lot of things where on my mind today for some reason i don’t why to be really honest. So at the end of the day i went to bus to go home and people are shoving and when i got in the bus where nobody can people still start pushing. I am like ” are you serious right now? You see that i cant fucking move right? So can you do me a favor and stop pushing like as if like your going to die, damn.” So everyone is looking as if i am some crazy retarded person. In my head i am saying ” okay you people could stop looking at me now!” But it was just weird though. Now i am home, thinking what i am doing for my little brothers birthday today. But i am pretty sure i know what i am doing. Any who i almost forgot the school i go to is Francis Lewis high school, so yea its very crowded. Alright well i really hope you got to know me for who i am right now and hope to make another one again. To think about it this kinda fun, posting about things on your own blog but this is my brothers, i don’t want to do anything stupid on here so yea. Have a great day you guys.

I HATE WHEN MY WORLD GETS SHITTED ON BY REALITY

Posted by ckashaan on February 25, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. Tagged: circle, concern, coping, emotions, family, grandma, grandmom, hospital, loss, love, parents, worry. 2 Comments

“If we can love someone so much, how will we be able to handle it one day when we are separated? And if being separated is a part of life, and you know about separation well, is it possible that we can love someone and never be afraid of losing them? Is it possible that we can live our entire life without loving at all?’ – Mew, The Love of Siam

Life has decided to remind me, in the form of a text Monday night, of the impermanence of those close to me. I live with a very tight circle of loved ones around me. I live in that circle because it is invulnerable to the outside world. I live in that circle because my obliviousness to its vulnerability makes me feel safe and have no worries about them.

But I was reminded that my  forced denial can be instantly blown apart.

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SOON, KIDS ON THE WAY

Posted by ckashaan on February 22, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. Tagged: adoption, anxiety, apprehension, child, childhoon, children, development, donor, family, father, future, kids, orphanage, parenting, parents, surrogate. 3 Comments

I am absolutely terrified of having kids. Always for my future, even since I was a little teenager, I had a certain vision. A cute little house with whoever I fell in love with and a couple of kids, 2 sons or a son and daughter. Interesting enough, when I was younger I wanted adoption to my first way of having kids before/if I had my own a natural way. I just looked at the staggering amount of parent-less children and thought it would be good if I could offer, at least one of them, a bit of family love.

Look at me being all altruistic. Continue Reading

Chillen With My Little Brother

Posted by ckashaan on February 20, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. 4 Comments

…My little brother wrote this post today. I see he wrote it from my point of view. No, this is wrong. I will correct him haha. Hope you enjoy it…

….And you can tell we have super twin telepathy going on. He knew my exact thoughts and everything. Anthony is my younger twin brother. Exactly 7 years apart on the same day….

On a very cold Sunday, i had to wait for my little brother Anthony to come back from his moms house so i could pick him up and  go to my house. So he comes home has to a lot of shit. But we didn’t end up leaving his house until 10:30. Then we were driving and as we were driving, Anthony was showing me a funny story on his phone that he read, it was funny but a little stupid. So we end up getting to my house at 11:00, yes i drove fast but i thought i was driving at the average speed as usual. Well that’s what happens when you don’t pay attention to the time. Any who so he was was playing some video games while I was pulling wavers for both of us to sign. So we both sign and i laughed because Anthony’s signature was in script instead of his own made up signature. But its an signature right? So we both went to bed after we played some video games. Anthony couldn’t sleep at all….. eventually he did but it was at 3:00am. Who drinks soda at 2:00 in the morning, but he slept. I was like “finally he’s asleep”. Any who so i woke up and got us some breakfast from McDonald’s by my house. We went off after we ate breakfast. But Anthony had two Barbados And i had a MC muffin.  We drove to New Jersey to go to a racing center and we did Three races. The whole goal of these races is to have the best time in the number of laps that you could do. I came in second twice because of this older guy was very skilled and Anthony…… came in 5th twice. I said “Little brother, where the skills at? we are twins. We have the same skills.” A little encouragement got him in first in the beginning of the third race. I was surprised I was like “No he cant beat me” so then i claimed my first as i passed. There other little kids so there was mo way i was going to lose to a bunch of little kids now. Anthony spun out and got him in 4th place, at least you did better little bro. After that we drove back to my house and got some lunch but on our there we got Halo4 (a video game)  then got Chinese food. Anthony had sweet and sour chicken and i had boneless chicken with rice. We were watching Archer as we were eating. It was funny but sounded like Anthony would say. But some things though. After like 3 hours of video games i had to pick up my sister from her house because she had to go visit someone. But we went to Apple bees. I had the pasta the new one. sadly it didn’t it wasn’t as good as i thought it would be. Anthony some stuff burger. He thought it was good and i had a piece if his it was good. We shared a chocolate Meltdown for the desert. I had a great time spending with my little bro. I hope we do something like this again.

THE ROOT OF SUFFERING

Posted by ckashaan on February 19, 2015
Posted in: Uncategorized. Tagged: bad, death, evil, good, people, philanthropy, pure, remorse, understanding. 4 Comments

Why is there evil in the world? Why do people do bad things? Lie? Cheat? Steal? Kill? You would think people wouldn’t want bad things to happen to them so they would avoid committing such atrocities, but it still happens. As if that should be enough of a deterrent, but it isn’t. I can understand the inherent will to “do good” doesn’t exist in everyone just like the inherent will to “do evil” doesn’t. …unless you’re like the spawn of Satan haha. I believe that all mannerisms are taught or learned, but they can be augmented in our minds because of how they make us react to the outcomes. Good outcomes, we gravitate towards increasing the frequency of and bad outcomes are undesirable and we seek to avoid.

Oh observant eyes of mine, help me to understand.
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