HAVING SIDES JUST COMPLICATES THINGS

Posted by ckashaan on May 3, 2009
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aight quick post, cuz its 1:50 am, im online, i meant to post about this b4 but i have sumthin bigger on my mind atm.

so 2 friends fighting. i choose to stay neutral. on friend makes me pick a side. after a while of “i have no opinion”‘s and “just tell me”‘s i was forced to state my thoughts. so i went through evrythin and stated my pre-reasons then stated my final choice. the side i was most leaning to, but preventin myself from going to. …it was the other friend…

granted i had a biased opinion and i havent had the same history with her as he did, but that was that. now i feel bad, cuz u never wanna tell one person that u agree more with the other. its just not a good thing.

and now u c y i follow my oath of neutrality to death…

oh and i ordered the whoopi goldberg: back to broadway dvd and the gears of war aspho fields book off amazon yesterday. cant wait til they get here.

til next time, stay frosty

AIGHT SO, THE NEXT POST IN THE INSTALLMENT…..THIS ONE’S FOR U ADAIAH

Posted by ckashaan on April 27, 2009
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aight so, the last one was about jason, its kindof obvious(only if u kno them 2) that the next one i did would have to b adaiah. they may not b friends anymore, but they r still 2 common parts of the main machine. (i so just came up with that)

so my issue with u i guess. well, when i think about it, we dont have any. …well I dont have any, although im pretty sure ur not festering any feelings against me. lol. but i have only 2 things to say.

first, due to sum things, its was weird for a while not seein u as often lol. like sumthin was out of place, but thats over and solved and i understand wut happened and i kno not to b so quick to assume and i kno now not to b so quick to think so much and i kno now to just flow more instead of pushin to try to and have things the way they should b(and yes i kno i put alot of “ands” in that, but it sounded really cool) and no this has nothing to do with wut we tlked about b4. thats over with. and marve is so cool. i just had to say that. its just gonna b a little while b4 me and him r like buddies lol. …a short time.

second, i have a question and think long and hard, cuz when u read this i want a serious answer.
     :y did u become friends with me? seriously.
 and do not think that that has anything to do with jason

til next time. stay frosty.

THE THEORY OF ART….

Posted by ckashaan on April 27, 2009
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OK SO IM A LITTLE OF SCHEDULE SINCE I SAID ID HAVE THE NEXT POST UP THE NEXT DAY. AND FOR THIS, I APOLOGIZE.

its actually kindof funny cuz ive been typing this post all day. i just kept havin to go from place to place to meet ppl and ive been hibernating my comp on and off. my laptop must b so tired. and for that, i apologize to u kakashi(yes i named my laptop kakashi. u got a problem?)

anyhoo. i had a couple of diff things i wanted to blog and those kept changing over the entire day(and so has the title), but now i kno wut imma say lol. u get a hint from the title. the inspiration from this post comes from adaiah since i was with her in the library cafe when i saw this title of one of the books she was puttin in her bibliography.

my idea of art is this, plain and simple. anythin can b art except for things u r told to make. like for example, a teacher assigns u to draw a self portrait. u draw one. …no this is not art…   a teacher tells u to draw a self portait and u draw a bunny on a hill. …yes this is art…

idk if u can tell the diff, but ill explain it. art is supposed to b a full expression of ur inner being. this is probably the sole reason art is still acceptable as sumthin productive to do with ur life and not a complete waste of time(no i dont have any bad feelings toward art at all…im just sayin). anythin can b art, if and only if, u urself r the one piloting the process. an example is handball(im usin handball cuz its extremely native to me. and i have another post about this also, but thats later in time). evryone hits the ball baq and forth with their palms or fingers to the wall. wut if u hit with ur head really high and it just makes the wall. ur still technically following the basic principles of the sport, ur just transforming it to wut u wanna do. ahh the difference atounds u, doesnt it? ok im just bein stupid with that one.

but my ideal stands i guess. how can an activity based upon ur own expression, be dictated by someone else. exclude someone inspiring u, cuz thats diff. lol

ok imma end this now, cuz im runnin low on battery power and there r like no outlets in my skool’s cafeteria, which is pretty nice btw. and im prob gonna post later anyway, cuz i got to make a post about my bestie cuz im  tryin to straighten out evry “issue”‘ i have with evryone. lol.

til next time. stay frosty.

BEEN MAD LONG…THIS ONE’S FOR U JASON

Posted by ckashaan on April 24, 2009
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omg its been a while xanga. but ive been on vacation and then ive been busy-ish, so i havent had as much time to post, but ive got a little time so im baq to typing. lol and i have alot of subscriptions to catch up on.

but first things first, jason. dude. i gotta say ur the coolest strght guy frnd i could have. but dont b so quick to get me off my switz dude. i do it cuz i have to, not cause i want to. if i saw a better way to handle conflict i would. this way i can avoid it, resolve it, never have to get involved. its best for evrybody. no reason anyone has to get hurt. its just better.

but of course this is sortof mentally taxing cuz i kno one day im gonna make a huge error and piss of both sides, but until then lets just take it slow ok?

til next time. stay frosty
who am i kidding, im gonna post 2moro…need to catch up lol

 

and btw, the song Talk Show Host by Radiohead is a great song. :]

CROSSING THE LINE

Posted by ckashaan on April 5, 2009
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so i originaly expected to come baq to xanga after my vacation away, postin about my experience helpin my sis move or drivin my dad’s new bmw, but after listenin to this song over and over and commentin on my friend’s status, ive come to post about sumthin else.

so my bestie from college has got a new bf(im using bf in this post as boyfriend and not best friend). i was like so happy when she texted me and told me he finally asked her. cuz she was mad stressed and she liked him. so life is good. life is fun, we’re jokin and stuff lol. then i come home and saw her new status on fb. so i go to comment and im mad stupid giggly cuz im the first one. then my browser froze(thx alot internet explorer) and i refreshed to c he commented b4 me and it hit me….hard.

i cant b the same close with her like i used to b. i gotta let her go to him now and i will b on the side, watchin from afar. all lonely me.

wow, i sound pathetic.

but now u see how the song helped me c this. Day and Night by Kid Cudi
lyrics:
  Day and night.
  The lonely stoner
  seems to free his mind at night.
  He’s all alone on through the day and night.
  The lonely loner seems to free his mind at night.
  A aa at night.

but its like a certain personal line i can no longer cross. and its sucks much. cuz then ill b crossin into his space, and id hate to b the bestie that got in the way, u kno? but its not like i have no other friends, just only a handful as close. ..i just counted, only 3 left..

but lol, i wouldnt have this post now if i wouldnt have posted after him. sumtimes life just sends u signals in weird ways. call it god, call it karma, call it the spirits, wutever. i just say “let me realize b4 i or anyone else gets hurt”

til next time. stay frosty.

(edit)i am so now goin to start lookin for a bf. hit that datin circuit hard man. so i guess u can say im taking applications