wow it seems like its been a while since ive come to u xanga on happier terms, but it just might b a little longer so hang in there. well gosh i might as well start off happy right? well im super stoked bout jonny movin in…whenever he decides he’s ready…i already got room for his stuff ready. just my over-preparedness kickin in.
umm wut else?
oh i found out i may actually have a chance at holdin my gpa for this semester, cuz i was gettin worried. as long as i do ok on the final, my grade will b fine.
no for the shit-list.
i guess my biggest issue right now is my friends. oh and not just random ppl i hang out with who i just happen to call my friend. no no no… im tlkin bout the ppl i consider extremely close to me. i have one insulting me to my face, which i at least respect, and another tlkin about me behind my back, which i think is worse. then i have another one leaving me out of important things…i partly understand, but its still the same pain u kno?
i just dont kno where u went wrong. im pretty sure sacrificing popularity for genuine friendships was a good decision. wasnt it? mayb im over-reacting. wtf?!? hell no im not. there is no excuse for betrayal. u who i called my partner in crime. u who i called bro. u who i called my dearest.
idk. mayb i should just start over. just go baq to my jhs ways. it was easier. i didnt have to care bout anyone except myself. no friendships to stress over maintainin cuz i was happy just bein with myself, and my girlfriend…but thats another story. unfortunately junior high also forced u to do group projects so i was forced to befriend ppl to get a good grade but wutever.
u think those who u choose to b ur best friends r those who will always have ur baq. but then i guess these r the risks we take. but wut is the point? shouldnt there b sum riskless procedure to finding the perfect friend? but then i understand y. there’s this quote from a song by james morrison “…love is hard. if it was easy, it wouldnt b nothing. no…” and i think it applies to friends as well. the bond between them is insane strong….well tru ones anyway. and there have to b risks that potentially involve u getting hurt or else there wouldnt b any value in trying to make them.
its just weird to me how my non-close friends r the ones makin me feel better.
but wutever i guess, depression is a part of life. a shitty part, but then again fuck it.
til next time. stay frosty.
(sry bout my language)